Sunday 20 September 2015

I Apparently Have Things To Say

Two posts in two days?!? What is this sorcery! 

So. Today I actually told one of my new friends that SURPRISE Im incapable of feeding myself properly. And she didn't run away screaming. I'm so excited. Like thank goodness. That was crazy nerve wracking. But it's all good. 

That actually wasn't the point of this post though. The point of this post is that today, i ate three meals. Like holy shit! I'm so proud. And so freaked out at the same time! But like yay. Yes. I kinda wish I hadn't. And yeah I have slight self harm urges. But I'm not gonna do it. I'm gonna be awesome and watch a movie with friends and maybe...maybe...maybe eat cookies and brownies with them. I'm not sure. Probably. Cause I don't wanna seem awkward. And like normalcy is probably the way to go. We'll see. 

Anyway! Thanks for reading my ramblings!

Stay Strong
xo Aria

Saturday 19 September 2015

I'm So Proud Of Myself

I don't think I've ever said the name of this post and actually meant it. But today...today I mean it. After 6 treatment stays. Including two this summer. Barely eating my first week at college and exercising more than allowed. I finally have it together. I have been eating. Having some water. Kinda. Exercising like a normal person. I even joined things that don't include exercise. I've made friends that have no idea about my eating disorder or my self harm past. And even though days are struggles still and a lot of the time, I'd rather not eat... I still do. I guess the moment for me that I realized I needed to write this post was when I drank normal soda the other night and didn't freak out. Not only that but I chose to drink it. For the first time in 6 years, I have friends, im eating, I'm caught up on school work and I'm happy. Life can be so good. Just let yourself have it. 

Stay Strong
Xo Aria