Tuesday, 31 December 2013

Happy New Year!

Well 2013 is officially over. Not gonna lie... that makes me really happy. I don't know why but something about 2014 makes me think it's going to be amazing. So let's hope my intuition is right!

My favorite celebrity is Demi Lovato and yes there is a reason for saying this. Back in November I bought a copy of her book. (If you haven't... you should.) And for each day of the year she puts a goal. The goal for January 1 is " in this new year, come up with a mantra that is just yours. Each day, look in the mirror and repeat it back to yourself". Demi's is " you are beautifully and wonderfully made", just in case you were wondering. If you me, you know that I'm not one for affirmations and I think they're silly. But now, thinking back over the past few months... I realized I already had one. And it's a quote from Demi herself. In some interview she said to say to yourself "you are beautiful and you are worth it" and I took it to heart. I don't repeat it in the mirror but it is a saying that gets me through when stay strong doesn't cut it. So I guess that is mine.


Stay Strong
xo Aria

Monday, 30 December 2013

I Have a Life?!?!

What is this craziness? I actually have a life. Not just a life but a life I'm not willing to give up. A life that I possibly could have had a long time ago. But no use in thinking about the past. Point is that my life is pretty awesome right now. It is so much better than being engrossed in my eating disorder. Which sounds ridiculous. Even to me. But no it is. It really truly is. There is nothing more satisfying than living. And that looks different for everyone and that's good. For me, the best parts of my week are during practice. Being able to hold myself up and the feeling of flipping over yourself. But the best is landing on your feet and knowing you stuck the landing. Knowing that you had the courage to let go and it worked. I don't know. It just feels freeing and amazing.

Not to mention... being present is awesome too. Actually being with people and being in the moment and experiencing things. It's a feeling I can't describe. But it is one that everyone deserves to feel. You will never want to go back. Especially after you smile for the first time without it being forced. Those seconds are priceless.

There wasn't much of a point to this post.  So, I will end it with the best part of my day today. Which was definitely landing my back tuck. It was awesome and terrifying haha. And totally overshadowed eating a huge FEAR FOOD with my dietitian. Hehe.

Stay Strong
xo Aria

Sunday, 29 December 2013

Realizing It Was Time To Move On

This past week or so, I realized that I really can do this recovery thing. And that is quite frankly the most freeing feeling ever. I even texted my dietitian about it! She said it was the best Christmas present ever. That made me laugh. But then she asked what helped me come to that conclusion and I had to think about it. It is what partially led to me making this blog in the first place. I said : A combination of things. I've been reminded constantly of the fact that I'm part of so many things bigger than myself and that's what I've wanted, I haven't been discussing weights and sizes with anyone for weeks and I finally accepted that I'm not that same broken girl that walked into Sheppard Pratt and I never will be. And I have the best friends a girl could ask for. " All of which us true. I am part of a team, a youth group,  a group of coaches, the recovery community. I refuse to discuss my weight with people. It isn't their concern. And I never will be the same person that I was over 2 years ago. I've had so many experiences since then and I've grown up. And of course my friends are legitimately amazing. They have stuck by me and listened to my endless rants. So many things have influenced me getting to this point and beyond and I can't wait to share my new journey with all of you!

" recovery didn't give me back my old life, it gave me a brand new one"

Stay Strong
xo Aria

(Somethings never change...hehe)